allright, i've neglected this blog for long enough, it's time to get some writing done.

i was standing at the gates of the school one afternoon, suddenly realising that there isn't a lot of time left for me in high school. Looking at the concrete wall of M block with bits of graffiti which the careless cleaner had left to stain. Could it be that one day i will think back and miss the time i've had in this place? I remember when i was first attending year 5, and everyday when i sat in the car on the way to school, i'd secertely pray that it will burn down before i get there. Now i am so familiar with it i don't know what life will be without it.
Yes, perhaps a few years on, when i am fully grown i'll come to appreciate the times i've had at school...
maybe i am being over-sensitive... because all the friends i've talked to either never thought about this, or they "don't give a damn", maybe it's because most of them never left to live in another country, so they haven't had those emotional experiences before. Maybe they hate the school so much they are happy to leave ; maybe that's why they made life so painful in year 11 and 12 so people won't feel sad when they leave school. Either way, i think most people will eventually come to miss their teenage years. If you think about life in the long run, this could be the best part of it.
lol... this sounds like something i should write at the end of year 12, not in the middle of year 11, but it came up to my mind for some reason, so i'll just note in down.

Last week's been eventful, with surprises both pleasant and unpleasant. To start with, i got my first ever major detention in senior school... (which is not a part of school i think i will miss) and not surprisingly, it was from chinese. I am tired of describing my chinese teacher. Just imagine your parents at their most exhausting, stubborn and annoying state and that would be her in a good mood. Apparently, she was NOT in a good mood on wednesday morning when i had my lesson. She gave us an essay to do the day before, and expected us to hand it in by the next(which is arguably a short time). Now i maintain to this moment that i would with every possiblity, complete the work even with such a short amount of time given that i had at least one hour. But on tuesday i simply did not have that luxury. There was sports training in the afternoon, and violin lesson at night. After which it was already 10pm.
A normal person could see that i should get at least one day extention, right?
I tried to tell her that, but the result was detention next thursday afternoon.
the only consolation being there are five other people who were similarly reprimanded, just to prove that i was not the only one finding it difficult to finish the essay.
now that i am despondent enough, i don't feel like writing anymore, maybe i'll write some more tomorrow. It's getting late

wish everyone well, and perth and uni people a good start to the new term
from a distressed panda

Me so tired

argh... when i had the inspiration to blog i had no time... and when time's abundant my brain's dry.

I am actually not looking forwards to weekends anymore; this has never happened before in my life. Usually my entire school week was endurable because of expectation of the two days rest after Friday, but since the beginning of this year, i am so busy catching up on work on weekends, there's just been no time to rest. Better readjust my timetable to find some sort of acceptable working pattern before i die of stress attack by the end of the year-.-

talking about stress... here's a little comic relief i found. Anyone whose familiar with sesame street should like this^^

Cookie moster searches deep within himself and asks: is me really monster?

Me know. me have problem.

me love cookies. me tend to get out of control when me see cookies. me know it not natural to react so strongly to cookies, but me have weakness. me know me do wrong. me know it isn't normal. me see disapproving looks. me see stares. me hurt inside.

when me get back to apartment, after cookie binge, me can't stand looking in mirror-fur matted with chocolate-chip smears and infested with crumbs. me try but me never able to wash all of them out. me don't think me is monster. me just furry blue person who love cookies too much.

me no ask for it. me just born that way.

me was thinking and me just don't get it. why is me a monster? no one else called monster on sesame street. well, no one who isn't really monster. two-headed monster have two heads, so he real monster. Herry monster strong and look angry, so he probably real monster, too. but is me really monster?

Me thinks me have serious problem. me thinks me addicted. but since when it acceptable to call addict monster? it affliction. it disease. it burden. but does it make me monster?

How can they be so callous? me know there something wrong with me, but who in sesame street doesn't suffer from mental disease or psychological disorder? they don't call the vampire with math fetish monster, and me pretty sure he undead and drinks blood. no one calls grover monster, despite frequent delusional episodes and obsessive-compulsive tendencies. And the obnoxious red grover--oh, what his name?--elmo! yes, elmo live all day in imaginary world and no one call him monster. No, they think he cute. and Big Bird! don't get me started on Big Bird! He unnaturally gigantic talking canary! how is that not monster? Snuffleupagus not supposed to exist-woolly mammoths extinct. his very existence monstrous. me least like monster. me maybe have unhealthy obsession, but me no monster.

no. me wrong. me too hard on self. me no have unhealthy obsession. me love cookies, but it no hurt anyone. me just enthusiast. everyone has something they like most, something they get excited about. why not me? me perfectly normal. me like cookies. so what? cookies delicious. Cookies do not make one monster. everyone loves cookies.

me no monster. me ok guy. me ok guy who eat cookies.

who me kidding? me know me never actually eat cookies. me only crumble cookies in mouth, but me no swallow. me can't swallow. me no have no esophagus. me no have no trachea. me only have black fabric throat. me not supposed to be able to even talk.

me no eat cookies

me destroy cookies

me crush cookies

me mutilate cookies

me make it so no one get cookies

everyone right. me really is cookie monster.

lol.... believe it or not, this was actually the essay we studied in my literature class a week ago... let's just say it was a pretty unususal /fun lesson^^

ok, me tired now

me go to sleep

night~

panda

Macneil won.

we won, we won, we won we won!

yes, that was one of the best moments in my life. Winning the house music. It's always the greatest feeling when you are the underdog and not expected to win, but thanks to another biased adjudicator Macneil get to take the trophy home this year.
This is always my favourite house event all year. Not only do you get to sing, but you won't feel embarrassed about it because 300 other people are singing just as bad as you. Still the competition is pretty tight and it's just breath-taking listening to the score being annouced. The whole school gets so into it.
Derham house always had the best preparation, it's just pure bad luck that they came runner-up three years in a row. Which is kind of cruel...considering their conductor killed himself putting on an incredibly dramatic performance. (we love you Webley!)
I can never understand how they adjudicate these things... take our part song for instance... we were singing ok at the start, then the audience started laughing because the song was so silly and childish(the song was twelve days of chirstmas!) well, that put us off for a second and we left out an entire line. On second thought... even if the audience didn't laught we probably would still forget the line. anyway, there was just this massive silence while the piano was playing, and we sort of humed and whimpered until we could remember the next line.
It was an obvious mistake and everyone heard it. As a result, we came first in the part-songs.
ah well... it's a school competition, it's not suppose to make sense. I am just happy enough to win.
By the way, i was standing in the middle of the front row when we sang, maybe that had something to do with it? ^^

Besides the music the week's been pretty hectic(school life... it's exhaustive), msn was negative and my social life shrank like a deflating balloon. How is everyone? I've been to albert's blog and read his summary on life in perth~ which sounded fantastic. But no one else seemed to have the time to update their blog... including me, up till now.

well, hope you guys are happy and enjoying yourselves... i am gonna relish my own happy moments for as long as they last.

panda

Between the suffocating grasps of homework and violin practice i am surprised i actually got time today to blog... well, i think if i make a commitment to it once a week maybe then i could sustain this webpage for a while, unlike the other time when i tried to keep a diary... which lasted for a pathetic duration of 72 hours.

lately, something has been bothering me, and it's not the fact that i still have 60 chinese general conversation questions overdue, but my mum's recent attitude towards... certain things.
Ok i understand being a mum she is supposed to be paranoid about her children and constantly giving lectures at the slightest sight of misconduct. Being a wise adult(which sometimes seemed seriuosly doubtful) she probably know what's best for me.
So, i don't understand, why for god's sake, that everytime she sees me talking, or even walking with members of the opposite sex she assumes that i am trying to date that person. One of my friends said to me the other day that "all guys go out with girls with ulterior motives" now, i don't argue that some guys do think like that, but i am sure that many others don't take such a sexist stance. I like to think i belong to the latter catagory; boys and girls are the same, you don't need a romantic relationship between opposite sex, but can still be friends with each other.
That is why i am getting excruciating annoyed every now and again when mum inquires about my friends. If i mentioned that "she" is a girl, then follows a string of probing questions like : is she good looking? where does she live? what school does she go to? what's her family background?
sigh... seems like my mum wanted to know the marriageability of every girl i know... now i am forced to develop evasive technics to avoid her question bombardment for the sake of my sanity.
Luckily last week she accidentally saw a picture of my brother's party, where he was sitting suggestively next to a "female" friend. So, while mum is distracted by her shocking discovery, i can take sometime to rest and brace for nine weeks of school ahead.

panda